Finding love is something most people hope to do. However, finding your forever person usually involves some failed relationships along the way. Relationships fail for many reasons, and they can lead to lowered self-esteem or toxic relationship practices. Luckily, if you think you’ve found your perfect partner, there are ways to build confidence in relationships.
We’ve all experienced pain when it comes to love. Whether it was infidelity, poor communication, toxic behavior, or overall mistreatment, failed relationships can leave us feeling scared. While it is important to learn lessons from past experiences, it is unfair to your new partner to be still focused on the failures of your past relationships. Here are five ways to build confidence in relationships to have a healthy and happy love.
1. Communicate honestly and effectively.
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Whenever you feel negative about an action your partner took or something that occurred in your relationship, it is best to communicate your feelings. How can your love do better if they have no idea they did something you didn’t like to begin with? Don’t wait until you are at your tipping point; have a conversation with your partner. Make sure you are honest, but also remain nice and consider how the information can best be presented.
2. Set and honor boundaries.
If you find yourself constantly worrying about toxic behavior from past relationships being repeated in your current relationship, consider setting boundaries before an incident occurs. Find some time that you and your person can dedicate to writing down boundaries that you both feel are vital to the success of your partnership. Be open about your negative experiences from the past. A good and loving partner will understand and do their best to honor those boundaries. Remember, for someone to honor your boundaries, you must also honor theirs.
3. Remain open and vulnerable.
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Believe it or not, being a closed-off person will not keep you from experiencing heartbreak. In fact, it may set you up for failure. According to Hold the Vision Therapy, one of the best ways to build confidence in relationships is to be vulnerable. Being mushy and gushy is probably not your favorite thing, but it can help your partner feel closer to you and meet your needs and expectations. Most importantly, they will feel as though they can be vulnerable with you as well. A healthy amount of vulnerability also builds trust.
4. Nurture your self-esteem.
The best way to show up for your person is to show up for yourself! When your self-esteem is low, it shows up in your relationships. The lack of self-confidence can lead to unnecessary arguments and poor boundaries. When you nurture your self-esteem, you know precisely your own worth, and as a result, your partner knows your worth—a person who understands their partner’s worth leads to honored boundaries and greater trust.
Nurturing your self-esteem can look like many different things. BetterHelp suggests several, including avoiding negative self-talk and celebrating your strengths. You can also practice affirmations and daily gratitude for everything you have and will receive.
5. Practice self-care.
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In addition to nurturing your self-care, practicing self-care is essential because you also show your partner the standard they must exceed. Additionally, when you feel good, your self-esteem soars! When you are confident in yourself, you can also be confident in others.
The best ways to practice self-care can include a host of things. Take yourself out on a date, or have a little retail therapy! You can also participate in relaxing activities like massages, pedicures, and soothing baths.
When it comes to having a healthy relationship, there is no “right” way to go about it. Think carefully about your relationship and consult with your partner about areas you can improve. Use one of these ways to build confidence in relationships and see growth!
Which of these tips will you be using? Let us know in the comments!