Can we get a little personal and real? No I mean, like for realsโฆ Can I take you a bit deeper inside my world, thoughts, and feelings? This is a safe space, yes? Especially as we head into the holidays, I come up on the anniversary of losing my grandfather, and I am face to face with childhood issues that have affected and impacted my life? Can we talk about self-care and how we navigate stress and learn how to fashion our own Rescue Remedy?
Self-Care? Anxiety? Stress?
Girl. I did not know that I had been a living and working with high functioning depression and anxiety. I did not know until I hit my wall and crashed. Hard. For me, I had buried and busied myself through hurt, embarrassment, pain, sadness, joy. I dug myself deeper into work to hide, run from, or to cover myself from whatever feelings, thinking that it would (or I could) disappear until everything smacked me in the face at once. Then everything became a trigger, everything had me on edge, and I was snot nosed, puffy eyes, exhausted crying, daily.
I was a hot ass mess. I wanted to disappear. I was skiddish. Everything triggered me. My mind was constantly racing. I didnโt believe things around me. I felt the lowest I had ever felt and I was scared. I wish this on no oneโฆ It wasnโt until I shared my thoughts and feelings with a loved one, that we were able to walk through and identify what it was. And then I started therapy.
So over the past few months, I have been learning how to mitigate, work through, and navigate through my feelings and emotionsโฆ My therapist helped to realize that I have never felt enough nor had I chosen myself. *sigh*
In addition to my uber amazing therapist, my transparency, and leaning on those closest to me, I have been seeking out products and natural products that help me get through it allโฆ Chamomile tea? YUP. Ample sleep? Mhhmmm. Sunshine? I have been trying to get out more. Physical Contact? I have been being proactive with reaching out to those who are near and dear to meโฆ I started researching and sourcing different things I could do to actually help get me to a better place.
When I was approached by Rescueย about their products, what and how they work, and the fact that they are natural products that help remedy stress? I was gameโฆ
Funnily enough, I already have my own regimen (or had one) that included working with natural products, but I hadnโt been using them! *sigh*
STRESS.
I have been internalizing it for so long, that it reminds me of a time that I took my tail to Planned Parenthood about 5 ish years ago, because I may have thought or was afraid that I was pregnantโฆ I had missed my cycle for two months and then it came for two weeks. TMI, but listenโฆ it is important. So when the test came back negative, the doctor pulled me into her office and asked me what was going on in my life? As I shared with her, with both compassion and concern (as well as a matter of factness to her) she shared that my body is taking on this stress and that I need a break.
What break? When I am grinding this out to build this brand? With what funds? Everything goes right back into the business! I couldnโt afford a break. I needed to work. I had to do more. I needed to be more. I found myself on a hamster wheel of my own making, never stopping to celebrate successes, milestones, or issues. Not feeling like I was enough as I was, I just kept working towards a never-ending goal.
So I started looking for vitamins, homeopathic ways to help myself navigate through thisโฆ fast forward years later and I crashedโฆ hard.
For my 35th birthday, I balled all morning. Had no energy to write my lessons learned or goals to do by 36. I cried. But, I had also started therapy and this was a good thing! I was quite happy about it and I saw that the universe was only affirming this decision with the myriad posts of therapy, depression, anxiety tools on Facebook and when Rescue products came along? I listened to the universe. I jumped, leaped, spring at the chance to play in and with a natural option to help me through it all!
Now before I share with you what I got, let me share with you why I decided to give it a whirlโฆ
โRescue Remedy is a combination of five of the original Bach Flower Remedies which are especially beneficial when you find yourself in traumatic situations, such as, stress, emergencies, after getting bad news, before an exam or job interview and all other kind of situations where we suddenly lose balance mentally. The Remedies quickly get us back in our normal balance so that we calmly can deal with any situationโ
So, after I read this, I was like, okayโฆ sounds promising! Impatiens, Star of Bethlehem, Cherry Plum, Rock Rose, and Clematis? Hrmmm. The breakdown of each ingredient and their individual properties had me curious and hopeful.
In my #stressless Rescue bag, I received:
- Two differently flavored Rescue Pastilles
- Rescue Remedy Spray
- Rescue Plus Sleep
I happen to already prescribe to the melatonin and chamomile options, so immediately I started out with the sleep gummies. My mind at night can race and I can get a bit overwhelmed in my thoughts. This does not leave me groggy, wired, or with crazy dreamsโฆ I feel rested and full of energy to take on life. Slowly I have been integrating Rescue products into my life, paying attention to my mood, feelings, and thoughts.
Add to that, my standing appointment with my therapist? I am learning how to deal with my stressors, feelings of not enough and inadequacy, family issues, and my confidenceโฆ
How I am Navigating Stress and My life right nowโฆ My Own Rescue Remedy
- Prayer
- Therapy
- Practice saying and believing: โYou are enoughโ
- I have been writing in a journal, writing out my intentions
- Allowing myself to feel (whatever feelings those are, rather than bury or dismiss them)
- Speaking up and out and talking about how I feel
- Letting go of things I cannot control
- Doing the things I may not really want to do (laundry, dishes, or whatever other chore I put aside)
- Calling and reaching out to those I care about more, rather than isolating myself
- Pouring love back into myself whether it be through affirmations, conversations, or staring at myself in the mirror and speaking beautiful to myself
- Drinking more water and eating better
- Using natural supplements
I am working on this list and am working on this one day at a time, sometimes one tear or one step at a time, but what I do know is that I am so focused on being a better Marie and with that comes work- work that I am ready to put in, to grow!
If you are ever looking for natural options, I invite you to check out Rescue and learn more about their products. ย You can also use their store locator to find where you can pick some up in your area.
But I want to hear from you! How do you navigate stress, days that you feel low, ugly, not cute, sad, and overwhelmed? What do you do that helps you navigate through it all?
Please share your thoughts, stories, and feedback so that we can learn from each other! I know I need your words!
Disclosure: This is a sponsored post with Rescue and my feelings and thoughts are my own
Wheeeeeew chile! This was SO ON TIME!! First, let me just say that Iโm SO proud of you. That awareness (by chance or choice) is divine. Iโve been struggling about a therapist for a few reasons; mainly because I hold a clearance and Iโve seen that go far left unfortunately. I went to my doctor about a year ago because I was feeling some of the things you described and I thought something was wrong. So I went and had her run every test and all my results came back great. She gave me a dose of vitamin D and told me if that didnโt help, weโd need to start thinking about seeing someone (therapist). Fast forward, it didnโt help and I havenโt gone back to her or a therapist, SMH. When I read โhigh functioning depressionโ my stomach dropped..Iโm about to go google! I might try these gummies, because me and energy arenโt on the same page. In the mean time I have times where Iโm able to use my own remedy to get back on track and itโs normally just loving on me times a thousand! Prayer helps tremendously (fully diving into church is my instant fix), the gym helps, cleaning and decluttering helps, water water water helps, and just spoiling me definitely helps. Self care normally puts me back in a great space. I was telling my gfs the other day that I never realized (pre-30) that taking care of me was so much WORK! LOL!! Keep pushing and keep doing your work, itโs such an awesome space. My Pastor calls it Cocoon season!!
Thank you soooooo much much love. It is and has been an interestingly uncomfortable place. It is funny yoru pastor calls it cocoon as I have likened this transition to the caterpillar processโฆ I mean, it is a lot and yes to all of that self care, which reminds me, I do need to find me a church home. STAT.
I have taken the rescue remedy for years cause I wanted to take less prescriptions. Works well if I keep up with taking it.
Thank you for the confirmation madame! This helps! What else have you done to help you walk it through?
You gotta take care of yourself boo!! , so glad you are doing it. รฐยยยรฐยยย Hugs!!
Thank you so much babe!
So am I! I love you Marie and thank you for transforming this 60ish old womanโs life. You helped me believe I was enough and Iโm living and believing that more and more each day, You will be in my thoughts and prayers and I truly thank you for your transparency. Although I am feeling more fabulous than ever, I do have my days. @ adult children, husband, and grad school so I will try out the rescue products, they have to be better than Tylenol PM to help me quiet my mind at night.
With hugs and love,
On my wall right now I have on a post it โYou are enoughโ because I always felt that there was something so wrong and broken with me that I could enjoy me. I crashed and I had to take some time to really figure out why do I put so much emphasis on what I donโt do. Healing was keyband being ok with not being on point 24/7. We as women keep the pain and stress hidden cause we do not want to appear weak. I reach out now and I have never felt so much better. Thank you for sharing, its appreciated. Muah!!
Girl. I soooo hear you on that reaching out part. I would just clam up and get hella awkward and full of nervesโฆ Anxiety is not a good thing to feel. Happy to see that you are taking steps to healing! So much going on nowadays that self care is really necessary to navigate through lifeโฆ
Marie, youโre an inspiration whether you feel UP or DOWN! รฐยยคย
thank you love! I love seeing your comments! How are you doing???
The Curvy Fashionista Grieving for our country. รฐยยยฐ Searching for good larger sized womenโs fashions in Japan. รฐยยย
Yes, Marie. Take the time to take care of you. We all must do it before our bodies and our minds force a break.
Amen.
I wondered why there were no posts lately. Be strong. You have so much fire in you and can carry yourself anywhere you desire.
Lately? Maybe not as much, but ive been posting daily? Maybe fb is hatingโฆ lololol
But thank youuuuuuuuuuuuuu
The Curvy Fashionista having a similar problem with a few other pages I follow. Hmmmmm
If you hover over the like and you can tick off how you want your frequency !
Thank you for sharing.. stay strong but do take a breakรฐยยยรฐยยยรฐยยย
Hugs to you. I think you are a very classy and inspiring young woman. Sometimes tho just putting one foot in front of the other is all you can focus on and in those moments breathe and think of one just one thing that makes you smile. And I hope it will remind you that there really are many things that will make you smile. And if all else fails try ice cream ๐ Luv.
Yes to ice cream
I need your closet
So glad you shared this. I eas having my own issues and lo and behold Iโm perimenopausal. Doctor gave me a natural supplement called Serenol. It has stopped night sweats, mood swings and anxiety. So glad I spoke up for myself and glad you did also.
Soooo happy to hear this! Speaking up is and can be a challenge, especially if youโre just learning the power of your voice
Hehehehehe
This article truly hit home for me as I am going through a rough time right now. Thanks for the tips and I appreciate the honesty! You rock!
Sending you soooo so so much love
You too! You are an inspiration!
Alicia Plussizemodel Creag-Smith, I believe in taking heed to signs and messages. Your encouraging words, and now this lets me know what I need to do.
No problem needed the words as well. Sisters helping each other
Sending you soooooo much love. The support here is a blessing!
Marie, Iโve been dealing with a lot of what you mentioned in the article. This morning was my mini breakdown.
OM goodness!! Iโm right there with you. I am normally about as positive and annoyingly cheerful until this past Saturday. Then I just crashed. My history: After 28 years of marriage, I ended up divorced. I lost my job. Moved to a completely new place where I have minimal support and am surrounded by no friends. Talk about starting over. I just felt invisible. Iโve always just pushed onward not really dealing with the pain. Sooo I have decided to take care of me and but myself on the front burner. I taking a vacay at Christmas and hitting the beach. Start looking for a church and reviving my creative side. I hadnโt thought of journaling, but what a great idea. No more just sucking it up, I need to express my fears and work at trying be more โฆ for myself.
One step at a time and do get help or build your tribe! Do not be a stranger Polly and soak up the beach honeyyyyyy!
The Curvy Fashionista you are sweet. Thank you for the words. You never know how much kindness makes a difference for both the giver and receiver. I making a game plan. Gonna work through it. Moment by moment. Day by day. Lots of รขยยครฏยธย from the mountains of KY.
Thatโs where Iโm at Polly. Feel like I gave all that I have and now Iโm being thrown away.
So sorry for your situation Polly, you are not invisible โ I heard your voice and hopefully others did tooo and yes it is a good thing to make yourself a priority. I think this is a good forum to speak within. Remember you are an important and vibrant woman with lots to offer. Take care
Anita Pastures OM goodness, sometimes We are guided into making heartbreaking choices. It took me awhile to realize that I was on verge of a nervous breakdown. I was numb for months after moving from the place I considered home. You are worthy of love and kindness. Finding strength at our weakest moments is a challenge. Anita Pastures
Susan Knight thank you!!
First step is recognizing the problem. I face the same issues as you. I applaud you for what you are doing for yourself. You are a priority!!!
Loving is difficult because we make it so. We place , especially women of color, loads of pressure on ourselves because we have to be and do more for personal success. My prayer for you is to be delivered from stress, anxiety, depression , and the foes of worry in this world. My sistah you have made it and are continuing to make it . May God give you the way and allow that light to shine so bright folks need shades around you . Iโm not preaching , but if I could I would tell you Iโve been at a pinpoint of suicide via alcohol and food and self mutalation and I say No More!!!! No more of this mess because I am worth it and He said I am worth it . So are you and anyone reading your blog. Ladies and gents, especially our younger people , it is time to fight for yourself and let this world know our worth and value. Speak to a counselor if you think itโs that bad. Speak to a spiritual advisor that you have discerned ordained my the almighty to help you . Speak in this blog for support because we should all be here for one another . If I could hold your hand and hug you I would and tell you it will be alright . Woo -sa , eat a slice of cake, and strut !!! Be in peace my sistah. Happy belated birthday and God speed .
Nothing makes me happier than listening to good music and cooking good food. The latter is not a vice, but a ministry: there is something soothing about researching what to cook, assembling the ingredients, and lovingly seasoning, tending to and serving the foodโall while listening to DโAngelo, Anderson.Paak, Goldlink, Solange and the creatives who move with their art. Truly, it makes me believe all is right with the worldโate least for that meal. Bonus points if this happens with friendsโthe people I love.
I cannot tell you how blessed I am to have you here as a sisterfriend. You exude love and warmth and Iโm so blessed to know you. And amennnnn to the food, honey because yessssss!
Thank you for sharing. I literally try to find the good in EVERYTHING! Even when I find myself around negative people or situations, I try to find the good. I laugh a lot, on purpose. The days that life just becomes overwhelming, I cry my heart out. When Iโm done crying I push whatever is left deeper, then find a reason to laugh.
Girlโฆ Iโve been allowing myself to do this. Itโs a relief.
It definitely is!
I enjoyed reading this post! Your mind and heart always need that healing remedy. I love reading, Thrifting, running and meditation. They help renew my mind body and spirit.
Thank you so so so much Wendy!
Love this! One thing I have come to realize is that I deal with stress in an unhealthy manner. I always turn to wine, beer, or alcohol. Whilst pregnant, that is impossible. I want to be better. I actually am interested in trying some of these products and getting back to some sort of balance.
But Iโd also say that therapy is everything and help
I actually spoke to someone today about going back to therapy. I get in these funks and I feel trapped. I havenโt seen a therapist in forever.
I loved this!
Thank you sis!!
THIS!! This!! ERRYTHANG about this!! รฐยยยฉ I always learn soooo much from uโฆ I appreciate your vulnerability because this right here? Was right on time! รฐยยยรฐยยยพ
Thank you for sharing Marie my outlet was food and trying to stay busy but I was so busy time started to pass by too fastโ I had one really big cry and I released some things I didnโt know I still
had buried. I am learning to be present in the moment & to work out issues instead of bury them- but I wil definitely look into the products
this post is everything!!!! thanks for the realness
Thank you, it was not easy, but i braved it and tried to own it
Iโm going to be really honest with you: The only thing that gets me through the muck and mire (realities) of life is the tender love of the Savior. You mentioned prayer as one of your de-stressing techniques and I urge you to pray with others. I urge you further to pray with solid Bible believing church folk. All good things come from the Lord and he has the power to strengthen your weary soul if youโll ask. I appreciate you and your posts, tipsโฆyour business side. And youโve also shared a bit of your personal side with us over the years. Thatโs why I feel I can tell you what I know to be truth. I will gladly be praying for you.รขยยครฏยธย
Thank you sis! Thank you.
I hit a wall a few months ago and had to do a hard reset. Time off work, therapy and I also take melatonin gummies. I actually sleep now. I feel like Iโve gained back some control but still struggling not to isolate and reconnect with friends. The older I get the more I want to be with my friends but it seems that adulting takes priority and we donโt connect the same. I donโt trust easily so its hard just to say โoh Iโll get new friendsโ. Im working on not taking it personal and just doing my part. That has been very therapeutic to me as of late.
Girl! A lot of this is me! *sigh* one day at a time!
Girl! Virgo problems รฐยยยรฐยยคยรฐยยย
I lovvvve rescue brand!! Glad you are finding something that works for you รขยยครฏยธย
Thank you babe! Which is your favorite one? This and learning new tools, outlets, and stuff to process helps.
Iโm going through my issues after my breast cancer treatment was done so I thought they put me on hormone therapy and boy talk about mood swings.depression and being emotional! But what helps me is doing art therapy.being surrounded by family and friends. Hope and pray you get through this
Fight!!! You are going to get through it.
Stand tall, recognizing you need help is part of the healing process. Youโve got this! Your posts give me hope that I will turn these new found self esteem issues on their ear and start rocking it my way again. Sending you love and light! รขยยครขยยครฐยยย
Thank you for sharing. Be well
<3 <3 <3
Thank you for sharing รขยยค For years I have struggled with many issues. Very recently someone who has my heart needed my words and help. From a place within I asked her to go outside and be with nature, to reconnect, draw strength, peace, beauty. It worked. I donโt remember to take my own suggestions and other times I do โ take a long hot/warm bath, read a book, listen to wonderful music, watch a show or movie that I enjoy or just curl up on the couch, take a nap. Do what soothes you, regenerates you, gives you peace. I think in North America we are losing sight of what it truly means to take a break and not feel guilty about it. One other thing I always try to remember โ feed yourself first as itโs the only way you can help yourself and help others, if thatโs your path. You, Marie Denee/The Curvy Fashionista are on a great path of loving and caring for yourself. รฐยยคย
The course โPositive Groundlessness and The Three Difficult Practicesโ taught by Pema Chodron on Udemy has brought me so much peace as of late. And Iโm a tough nut to crack having struggled with chronic depression since I became a teenager. Any of Pemaโs teachings really. She is a treasure. Wishing you peace and comfort.
Ohhhh thank you, I will look that up!
I had to press pause on my career and take care of myself. Iโve been attending group therapy and itโs been amazingly helpful. Grief combined with daily stress had built up and started to prevent me from living my life. Iโve learned even though depression lies and anxiety tries to trick you, there are tools that can help me out of that hole. Thereโs hope.
I got this tattoo as a symbol to remember my journey. The heart for self love, the semi colon so Iโll keep on going, and the musical rest symbol to remind me to breath.
Yes me too I am going on a new phase or journey I have some things I have in place to make myself successful in life seeing up my exercise space with intentions to set a meditation area for quiet reflection and yoga
I รขยยค your courage, vulnerability, subtly and your spirit, sis. #Queen
You were there for the start of this process. Your love, push, and support has been everything. I love you !
I can relate to this on every level. Also, I have a few friends going through traumatic events and I hope that your ability to speak up may give them the awareness to face their own reality. I have to face mine as well.
Iโve been on the verge of tears on a daily basis for quite some time. I lost over 100lbs last year and then started taking Depo Provera. I was ecstatic to have birth control after 10 pregnancies and 7 births. However, I gained back 80lbs and since then Iโve been in a very deep spiral. I also have a severe back injury and the weight gain has made my condition worse.
Thank you for being strong enough to share. It may have seemed to come at a weak moment but in reality, it takes a calm soul to open up in such a personal way.
I always support you, Feisty. Youโre always genuine and your positivity, even in darkness, is a blessing to so many. <3
I just want to hug you babe. Hug you.
This hit home for me. The past few weeks have been so difficult for me to get it together. Minor disclosure: Iโm a therapist. Ahhhh!!!
Self care is so important. Lately, Iโve been listening to sleep meditation music at night to put me to sleep and stay asleep. Ive been baking. I listen to music in my car at full volume instead of making phonecalls. But it just hasnโt been enough. Sometimes we have reevaluate coping skills and relaxation techniques. Personally, I think diet and exercise need to take priority for awhile since they have been on the back burner.
Prozac! I hit my wall a few weeks after my daddy died. I am going to try these products
Thankyou for your honesty so many women feel, like myself that you have to be everything to everyone. My faith, great friends and being aware of what appears small or insignificant has helped me alot and , โthe รขยย stopping and smelling the coffee moment that sometimes we miss because we are so busy. Being a mum to two Great children who are just รฏยผยso awesome lifts me on the days when I feel like Iโm burning out. Keep doing what youโre doing it makes a difference blessings alwaysxxx
Thanks for sharing รฐยยยรฐยยยฝ. I recently found a baby photo of myself รฐยยยถรฐยยยฝ and saw what a precious and cherished baby girl I was and am. I carry that photo as a reminder that when I indulge in negative self talk and self cruelty it is โherโ I am hurting and she deserves love and protection. This has taught me so much about self-compassion! Progress not perfection รฐยยยรฐยยยรฐยยย
I wouldnโt wish it upon anyone either, this has been my life for the past two years, brutal. Much love to you xx
Sending you so much love right back!
You are worthy!!!
Im starting to believe this!
One day at a time sis!
Shahira รขยยก
รขยยครฏยธย
Thank you for sharing!!!!
Thanks love!
Thank you! I needed this!
happy to help love
Bless you for having the courage to share your struggle. Prayers for your continued path to full restoration. It was so good to see & chat with you Saturday. รฐยยย
Thank you so so sooooo much
Ok i love love loved this article!! Thank you sooo much for sharing! And for the product recsโฆ since your #1 cope method was prayer, im sending you another article that may assist with that as well. I so love your transparency, thank you girl!
Thank you babe!
Antonis check it
First off, thank you for being brave enough to share. The last several months have been just like this for me โ tears, overwhelm, exhaustion, and being uncomfortable in almost every way. The looming thought of thinking that โIโm not enoughโ haunted me so much to where I believed it for a bit.
How Iโm learning to handle it all is by going through the feels, but not for too long. I try not to sulk and become intentional about leaving the house. Listening to good music, deep cleaning my home, cooking while listening to that good music, *sleep*, and just loving on my lovable kid truly helps. I also cannot discredit writing it out, prayer, and on-time scriptures.
I donโt do this in any particular order, but instead, based on what the occasion calls for. And now that youโve shared your experience with chamomile and melatonin, Iโm open to trying that, too. Thanks so much and blessings to you, Sis!
Thank you so much for being so supportive babe. I appreciate your kind words. Allowing yourself to feel is a big oneโฆ. I would often minimize of make no big deal of it, when indeed I was affected or felt a way. YES and AMEN to sleep!!!!
The doctor prescribed vitamins and they help a lot especially being a woman, mother and wife. I know it might sound clichรยฉ but Iโve learned to pray more and be by myself in order to get to know the real me which is Hollie. Weeping only endures for the night but happiness will be upon you.May you have better dayโs @The Curvy Fashionista รฐยยย
This is such a beautiful and honest post. I am learning to cope with my anxiety, even though I am on medication. One day, I hope to be at a place where there is not needed. I appreciate people who openly write about anxiety because it is time to end the stigma.
Very powerful! I read your article and could almost pinpoint things that resembled my life from many years ago as well! Definitely in a better pattern today โ beautiful insight into something not many people even realize may be happening with them.
<3 <3 Thank you so much for sharing!!! ๐ Happy to hear you are in a better place too!
Exercise. Eating veggies. Me time.
Me time is a new one and oftentimes hard. I keep telling myself it is okay! LOL
Definitely agree everyone else comes first. Husband,kids even elderly parents.
Good read and good advice. Thanks for sharing!!
Thank you!!!!
I think I just figured out why Iโve been having some of the thoughts and feelings Iโve been experiencing.
Ohhh???
You are so wholly authentic and thatโs why I enjoy following you โ I trust you! TY. I hope we help in your journey<3 (btw I think I'm a year behind you ๐
Iโm not but I canโt figure out why .
Do you mean, figuring out why you do not make time for you??
The Curvy Fashionista It is several things. I feel low the high , but not in a depressive way. Just in that I keep trying and failing and then I have days where I just donโt do what I should because I know if I try I will fail. I keep at it though. I just need to find that rhythm that keeps me consistent.
Yep this is me. Thank you so much for sharing.
<3 <3